Comprehensive Divorce and Co-Parenting Resource
Divorce is a challenging experience, especially for kids and teens. For teens, they are in the middle of high school or maybe just entering college, and suddenly, their family life changes dramatically. They might be juggling school work, extracurricular activities, and friendships while dealing with the emotional toll of a family breakup.
It's important to recognize that feeling a mix of emotions – from sadness and anger to confusion and relief – is entirely normal.
It's not easy, but unfortunately, it's all too common. About 35% of all marriages in the United States end in divorce over the last decade (2012-2022), and many kids are navigating this challenging path.
YEAR | MARRIAGES | DIVORCES | % DIVORCE |
2022 | 2,065,905 | 673,989 | 33% |
2021 | 1,985,072 | 695,509 | 35% |
2020 | 1,676,911 | 630,505 | 38% |
2019 | 2,015,603 | 746,971 | 37% |
2018 | 2,132,853 | 782,038 | 37% |
2017 | 2,236,496 | 787,251 | 35% |
2016 | 2,251,411 | 776,288 | 34% |
2015 | 2,221,579 | 800,909 | 36% |
2014 | 2,140,272 | 813,862 | 38% |
2013 | 2,081,301 | 832,157 | 40% |
2012 | 3,131,000 | 851,000 | 27% |
TOTALS | 23,938,403 | 8,390,479 | 35% |
The good news is that there are plenty of resources that can help make sense of this tricky time. It's important to take advantage of these. Studies show that kids who have strong support systems, divorced parents or otherwise, fare better both emotionally and academically. Simple acts, like being there to listen, offering words of encouragement, or getting access to professional counseling can go a long way.
Navigating this new terrain can be tough, but remember – it doesn't have to be alone. With the right resources, like the ones below, a child of divorce can come out on the other side stronger and more resilient than ever before. You can also consider the helpful advice and guidance for a local marriage family therapist.
Articles
How Divorce Affects Children, Age by Age
Published in Parents Magazine, this article looks at the effects of divorce on kids, such as the feelings of rejection or loss they experience.
Don’t Let Your Kids Be Casualties of Divorce
Alan Ravitz talks directly to parents in his piece to explain the issues that happen in kids during and after a divorce that parents want to avoid.
The Impact of Divorce on Children
Divorce involves more than just a legal proceeding, which is why this article that looks at the impacts at every stage is so helpful.
Supporting Kids During a Divorce
A writer for the Child Mind Institute worked with clinical experts on this piece to provide parents with tips to support their kids during their divorce.
Creating a Stress-Free Divorce for Your Kid – Or Getting as Close as You Can
Pick up some handy tips here on how you can avoid stress during your parents’ divorce and find some tips you can give to them.
Rule #1 of Divorce: Don’t Trash Your Ex in Front of Your Kids
A divorced woman talks about her experience here and how she learned the most important rule was to never discuss her ex in a negative light.
Helping Children and Families Deal with Divorce and Separation
Not only does this article mention the impact divorce and separation have on kids, but it also offers guidance on helping those involved handle the situation.
Divorce is the Most Important Story You’ll Ever Tell Your Child
Kerry Lusignan is a mental health counselor who wrote this piece to help parents understand why they must be honest about their divorce.
Divorce and Children: Guidelines for Parents
Discover what your parents should do when they divorce and learn how to talk with them in this piece that also looks at divorce’s effects on kids.
In this article, you’ll find simple tips on how parents can talk to their kids about their divorce and help them cope with their feelings and emotions.
Scholarly Articles
The Impact of Family Structure on the Health of Children: Effects of Divorce
Using more than 20 years of research, this paper discusses why children lead happier and healthier lives when they have happily married parents.
Parental Divorce or Separation and Children’s Mental Health
Learn more about the effects separation and divorce have on the mental health of kids in this piece, which also looks at alternatives to traditional marriage.
The Behavioral Effects Divorce Can Have on Children
Wanda M. Owens-Williams designed her thesis at the City University of New York around the behavioral effects seen in children after their parents divorced.
Parental Divorce is Not Uniformly Disruptive to Children’s Educational Attainment
Kids have different reactions to divorce, which is why this journal article focuses on their reactions and how they affect children’s education.
Impact of Parent’s Divorce on Children’s Education for Disability Kids
The authors of this article look at how kids with special needs react to divorce and what impact the change has on their education.
Are the Kids Alright? Helping Children Thrive Through Divorce Using Narrative Therapy
Narrative therapy uses stories as a way to help kids grow and is the focus of this article that looks at how it helps kids get through a divorce.
Families in High Conflict Divorces: Parent Outcomes of No Kids in the Middle
Learn about the outcomes of the No Kids in the Middle concept, which strives to help parents complete their divorces with minimal impact on their kids.
The Kids are (Going to be) Alright: Authorship of a Post-Divorce Narrative
Writing for James Madison University, Caroline Hamby explains that while things seem tough now, kids who go through a divorce do recover.
Divorce Education for Parents: A Comparison of Online and In-Person Delivery Methods
This study looks at the increase of divorce education classes now available, the different types, and what parents get out of them.
The Kids are OK: Divorce and Children’s Behavior Problems
The author behind this piece discusses the negative impacts of divorce and how children react in different ways to show that they will be okay.
Adolescents
Helping Preteens and Adolescents Adjust to Divorce
Lisa Wallace and Kay Sparks talk about the emotional and other responses older kids have to divorce and what their parents can do to help them.
The Impact of Divorce on Adolescents
Find out the effects divorce has on adolescents in this piece to see you’re not alone in the way you feel and how you can get help when needed.
The Negative Effects of Divorce on Adolescents: How to Mitigate the Damage
Troubled Teens designed this page of its website to help adolescents learn about the effects of divorce and how their parents can limit them.
Learn about the long-term effects divorce has on adolescents and how those effects impact both their mental and behavioral health.
Videos
How Divorce REALLY Impacts Kids’ Mental Health
Shrink Tank talks with older teens and others who saw their parents go through a divorce to talk about the impact it had on their mental health.
Psychological Impact of Divorce on Children (Mental Health Consequences of Parental Conflict)
Professor Suresh Bada Math uses his experience in this video to focus on the consequences and impacts divorce has on the mental health of involved kids.
Unlocking Resilience: How to Help Children Thrive After Divorce
Watch this video to see how you can survive and even thrive after your parents’ divorce as you learn how to reduce the side effects you experience.
The Impact of Divorce on Children
This TED Talk spends nearly 20 minutes letting a relationship expert discuss the short-term and long-term impacts that divorce has on kids of all ages.
The Effects of Divorce on Children’s Mental Health
This video from Equal Exes looks at how parents are often concerned only with their feelings when they should focus on the effects it has on their kids.
Children & Divorce: Playful Tools to Support Child & Family Clients
In just over 10 minutes, you can watch this short video and find some simple tools that help you cope with your feelings and accept your parents’ divorce.
Divorce and Children’s Mental Health
Lee Health released this video to talk about how divorce affects kids’ mental health and what both they and their parents can do to help.
How Do I Help My Child with Difficult Experiences Such as Divorce and Separation?
The Child Mind Institute consulted with experts in this video, which goes over how adults can help children deal with separation and divorce.
Kids are Victims: Effects of Parental Divorce on Mental Health
Watching this short video is a good way to get an overall look at the effects your parents’ divorce has on you and your mental health.
How to Actually Help Your Kids Deal with Divorce
Find out if your parents did the right things and what they can do to support you during the divorce in this simple and forward video.
Books
In Tadpoles, Matt James tells a simple story about a father and son learning about tadpoles together, showing that divorced parents can share special moments with their kids.
This book focuses on siblings with separated parents who learn that separating isn’t the ending they thought after they experienced an unusual event.
The illustrations in this book are entertaining and help readers understand that divorce brings changes to their families but that they’re still a family.
Dinosaurs Divorce: A Guide for Changing Families
To make divorce simple, the authors of this book combined cute pictures and a basic story about a dinosaur learning what divorce means and how to accept the change.
Another cute book that helps kids understand what divorce means is this one, which uses colorful illustrations and a short story that shows kids that divorce is sometimes the best for their families.
It’s Not Your Fault, Koko Bear: A Read-Together Book for Parents and Young Children During Divorce
In this book, a little bear named Koko feels guilty for causing his parents’ divorce but learns in the end that it wasn’t his fault and that his family will be okay.
Nancy Holyoke wrote this book in the American Girl series to help young girls realize that divorce is tough but that they can rebound and get back on their feet.
In Two Homes, readers learn that two homes can be better than one as it uses a kid’s perspective to go over how the child now has a favorite thing at each home.
In this book, Anastasia Higginbotham takes a funny approach to divorce, letting kids know that while things are bad now, they will get better.
Living with Mom and Living with Dad
Divorce means living with mom and dad in different homes, but this book helps kids learn that it can be both a different and a fun thing.
Podcasts
Divorce: What I Wish My Parents Knew
Grace Casper uses her experiences as a child of divorce in this podcast to talk about what she wishes her parents knew and did differently.
Cass Thorburn went through a bad divorce that required her to start over again, but she uses her experiences to help others learn life will get better.
The High Conflict Co-Parenting Podcast
In this podcast, the hosts discuss what a co-parenting relationship needs and how parents can minimize the impact it has on their kids.
The Divorce and Beyond Podcast
Susan Guthrie wants to be the voice you can trust, which is why she runs a podcast devoted to helping others deal with the complications of divorce.
Every episode of The Divorce Podcast brings in a couple who discuss their divorce and how they managed to get through those issues.
Surviving Divorce Podcast: Hope, Healing, Recover, Personal Finance, Co-Parenting
With more than 20 episodes available, this podcast is a great way to learn about the challenges parents face as they go through divorce.
Raising Strong Kids Through Divorce
This podcast focuses more on the kids who are divorce survivors, helping parents realize what they can do to help their kids stay strong.
Dr. Aliza worked with Dear Media to create this podcast that deals with issues that affect children and how to help them recover like divorce and separation.
The Only Podcast for Children of Divorce
You’ll find more than 100 episodes of this podcast that allow the children of divorce to talk about their experiences and the challenges they faced.
Though designed for divorced moms, this podcast is also helpful for kids who want to see what their moms go through and how they manage to get by.
Tools
My Family’s Changing Activity Book for Teens (Dealing with Divorce)
Download this simple book to gain access to dozens of tasks you can do to deal with divorce and adjust to the changes in your family.
Mighty and Bright has a page on its site filled with tools for kids to help them deal with divorce like cute books and co-parenting calendars.
Designed for co-parenting situations, the Onward App helps couples manage their expenses, share information, and pay each other when needed.
FAYR is an app that bills itself as Co-Parenting Simplified because it helps parents collaborate on parenting plans, schedules, and much more.
Our Family Wizard is a co-parenting app with high reviews from users who love how it helped them manage and maintain shared schedules.
Though not designed for co-parenting situations, COZI helps you organize and keep track of important dates on a calendar you can share with others.
The developers behind 2houses wanted to help parents handle the challenges that arose after divorce with a shared calendar, financial support, and other features.
CoParenter is an app designed for divorced parents that helps them check in with each other, keep track of appointments, and get mediation help when needed.
The Divorce Workbook for Teens
This useful book offers tons of activities to help teens move beyond their parents’ divorce, including learning how to handle their emotions and how to develop coping skills.
Teen Survival Guide to Parent Divorce or Separation
Work at your own pace as you move through this self-guided workbook with activities dedicated to the role of your family and what divorce means.
Parenting Plan
Learn what a parenting plan is, the benefits it offers, how to create one, and some good tips in this PDF that is available for free.
The Oregon Court System offers this resource to help parents understand what a parenting plan includes and how to build one that works for them.
Making Your Parenting Plan Work
From the Association of Family and Conciliation Courts, this page looks at what a parenting plan must include to benefit the children involved.
From Talking Parents, this article takes just five minutes to read and helps you learn the basics of creating a parenting plan that includes all elements needed for shared custody.
A Guide for Joint Custody and Shared Parenting
The AFCC created this detailed guide for divorced parents who share custody, helping them learn how to communicate and design a parenting plan that includes education and medical care.
Use the tools and guides from the Resource Center on Domestic Violence to find out what you need to know when going through a divorce that involves abuse or violence.
Webinar: Protective Parenting Plans
Watch the three videos on this page to see how to create a parenting plan that keeps kids safe in situations that involve a violent parent.
We Agree: Creating a Parenting Plan Parenting Agreement Worksheet
Available from Oklahoma State University, this worksheet helps two divorced or separated parents create a parenting agreement that benefits their kids.
Learn what a parenting plan should include on this website and get some tips on how to create a simple plan that puts the kids first.
Creating and Maintaining a Parenting Plan
Though designed for parents in Florida, this resource benefits parents in other states as it helps them learn how to create and maintain a strong parenting plan.
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